I am Afraid of Having Sex, What's Wrong With Me?

Iam a 27-year-old woman who has never had sex before. Although I have dated many before, I have never taken the relationship forward because I think I have a phobia of sex. Trouble started when a man I am dating made a move on me when we were on a date. Although my date had only tried to hold my hand, I panicked and left, leaving him behind. He is a very nice person otherwise. But he has refused to take my calls after that incident and I very worried. I think there's no point in explaining things to him because nobody understands me.

I think I have sex phobia and I think I am a freak of nature. I don't want to ruin more relationships in the future. Please help me.

Ans: You could be having what is known as genophobia or fear of having sex. It is also known as erotophobia. The sufferer usually panics at the thought of having sex. The thought of sex alone can make the person nervous and anxious.

Why Does it Take Longer for Women to Orgasm?

The fear that you may feel is very intense and often not comprehended by others around you. But that's ok. No matter how much you try, you cannot do anything to reduce your fear. Avoiding the situation may seem like the only option. The fear may be accompanied by dizziness, palpitations, sweating and nausea.

There could be many causes of sex phobia. These include vaginismus, erectile dysfunction, sexual abuse or rape, performance anxiety, etc.

But that doesn't mean there's no cure for sex phobia. The best diagnosis can be made only by a psychologist, who may suggest a proper treatment method. Sex phobia can be treated by cognitive behaviour therapy and exposure therapy.

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